OBSCENE CITY #139

by Matthew Bedard

Hi Siri, it’s been ages since we last spoke. After punching out The Nine Lives Issue,we hot-stepped over to the SIXTY Beverly Hills with Diesel Black Gold (and Diesel Black Gold’s Andreas Melbostad), to honor our 15th Anniversary Issue cover subject Garrett Hedlund and to celebrate the launch of Diesel Black Gold at Saks. We rubbedelbows with Miss J around the pool, pondered the difficulty of keeping an elegant smize whilst synchronized swimming, sipped Stolen Rum Coke & Smoke, eyesentranced by Kirsten Dunst’s mint green frock. Somehow we made it home. How?Who cares. We’re just playing jazz.

There’s an art to royalty, all that curtseying, the slight raising of an eyebrow atan uncouth comment, the delicate sipping on a champagne flute when the silent strangulation of a corset during a portrait sitting from earlier in the day asks you to suck down a scotch. So we were delighted to join Pamela Anderson at the Hotel Bel-Air, where she was awarded The Dame of Grand Cross of the most prestigious knighthood title of Constantine Order of Saint George by Prince Cernetic—a titlewe’re still trying to bend our minds around—for her contribution to the protection of marine life and the conservation of the wildlife. We toasted to Ms. Anderson, thengrabbed our vegan leather satchels and scampered off to the next event.

Who says that Idiocracy is looming? We read stuff all the time—entire books,even. To prove it, we teamed up for L.A. Lit Crawl at Kahuna Tiki in NoHo with our gracious friends at the Los Angeles Review of Books—those wonderful and talented folks dedicated to keeping the craft of the printed word alive and well. Featured writers David L. Ulin, Todd Edwards, Nina Revoyr, MichaelJaime-Becerra, Maria Bustillos, Lynell George, and Victoria Dailey read about our fair city’s favorite import, the palm tree, from their featured collaboration in Flaunt’s 15th Anniversary Issue, The Selfie Issue. We laughed, we cried, we lurked in the shadows and swigged bourbon from a flask. Cheers.

We took a quick break from our cultural activism and artistic contemplation, tousled our pocket squares and combed our quaffs, and helped designer Søren Sand ring in the release of SAND Copenhagen’s fantastic Fall/Winter Collection (along with our veryown The Grind Issue) at Sunset Plaza in WeHo. Joining us in raising a glass on this night of nights were a range of beautiful, talented pals—style icon Cameron Silver, actors Garrett Clayton, and Chris Zylkawith wife model/blogger Hannah Beth, all hobnobbing with bloggerTommy Lei. Our pockets abuzz from our East Coast Flaunt friends.

Our New York arm spent that same evening in a slightly colderlocation, Cipriani Wall Street for Fashion Group International Night of Stars, rubbing ’bows with Olivia Palermo, wolf-whistling Brunello Cucinelli after his Fashion Star award win. Then we hopped an Uberhome, good-naturedly arguing with our driver about whether or not they’d let their child slather acrylic on their Birkin for an arts and crafts project.

The night was nimble, then the hangovers handsome when weslugged some Krug and set the feet to flutter with Natalie Portman and passed the chutney with James van der Beek at the L.A. Dance Project’s second annual benefit at the Cooper Design Space in Downtown L.A. Fortunately the professionals from the LADP were

there to demonstrate the art of how to move, but in our shimmering Tom Ford cocktail attire we managed to convey motion without movement—style withoutstress, elegance without effort...at least until too many of our flutes passed counter-clockwise beyond the horizontal.

We hitched an Uber (black of course) down to Melrose Place to share an easy G&T with Yeezy, as (we and) Kanye West helped to celebrate the opening of A.P.C.’s new store.

COS opened their new shopfront on North Beverly Drive, and we couldn’t resist the festivities when Dev Hynes invited us to partake in a vodka and orange (blood orange of course—and who were we to say no?).

With an axe to grind we headed to London’s Dean Street, celebrating the release of The Grind Issue with SAND Copenhagen and Benedict Cumberbatch atSoho’s Blacks Club—but then we ditched the axe and picked up a Hoxton gin drink and gathered a companion. But who to choose with such an eclectic mix of London’s finest and coolest? We rehydrated our digestive systems with organic CPRESS Juiceand walked about the club, itself decorated in collaboration with the Cob Gallery.

Something to worry about: We may soon have machines for friends, and thenwe may very well be at the mercy of those machines. But as W.C. Fields put it, “I never worry about being driven to drink; I just worry about being driven home.” Touché, W.C. For the Nine Lives Issue, we celebrated the fruits of our labor in old Paris, courtesy jewelry designer Edouard Nahum and with support from Jean-Charles de Castelbajac. In attendance were Nine Lives cover star Diane Kruger and bae Josh Jackson. Post-feast cocktails were served, post-hug handshakes were met,

and looked at post-internet art on our post-modern smart phones. All in the the lap of the private loft at L’arc (near Arc de Triomphe).

In between issues we made our way down to thenew DSquared2 boutique on Rodeo Drive. Dean and Dan looked dazzling and invited a slew of friends to ring in the new store with them, including the one and only Paris Hilton.

Off to The Hollywood Roosevelt Hotel, where webundled up in our snuggliest wool jacquard and hitthe rooftop (64°? What is this? Soviet Vostok Station?!). Anyway, we joined buds Ksubi and William Henry andcelebrated the release of The Grind Issue in the only way we know how: toasting with a private, intimate performance by cover stud and host Nick Jonas,downstairs in Teddy’s Lounge. This was a perfect night,where Tequila Avión and Absolute Elyx flowed like wine, and beautiful guests—Brian Lichtenberg, Yu Tsai, Jonas’ lovely girlfriend Olivia Culpo, and olderbrother Joe, to name a few—instinctively flocked likethe salmon of Capistrano.

We partied worldwide, all in honor of the Battersea Park development. The power station turned park will house a community of homes, shops,cafes, and offices. On this night, our body housed aboutfive scotches and a shot of tequila. Kate Beckinsale,Aidan Turner, and Robbie Rogers were in attendance— Beckinsale broke our hearts in her white cut-out dressand Louboutin heels.

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